These lulling days after Christmas are always the site of an inner battle to stay fresh and motivated. Why not just wait until the New Year and get a real fresh start? It's more accurate to say that we get a fresh start each day, but if I had to go round for round with myself every morning as to whether I should get up for the morning yoga class, I would exhaust my reasoning abilities in a few short days. Let's face facts and admit that there are days that are lost to the fogginess that we sometimes just don't have the energy to clear.
This morning I had planned to wake up at 6:30 and take the blue line to an 8AM yoga class on the north side - the only studio I could find in Chicago offering a class that early on a Sunday. I found many studios much closer, but their classes only started at ten or later. Last night, anything after nine am seemed like a waste of time. I woke up at 9:45 this morning and had my dad drive me the two blocks to Tejas Yoga, so I wouldn't be late for their 10AM class. Another day I might have woken up late, labeled the day a waste and skipped yoga altogether. But this was precisely my intention in scheduling such an early class - get up and commit yourself before your mind even has awoken enough to protest.
Somebody asked me the other day if I was still feeling "fresh". I had commented that I felt a particular awakening after the solstice last week. It's comforting to know that the days are finally getting longer now. I'd say its a battle for me to maintain fresh determination and motivational thoughts in such bleak weather. If I could run off to yoga, or the coffee shop to do work in a long dress and sneakers I'd like to think I'd be much more productive. However, there is the romance of sitting on the second story of a good coffee shop drinking cappuccino.
The conclusion is, I'm applying for four internships and I'd be happy with any of them. I'm tiding between motivated energy and a busting frustration. Just keep swimming!